this game is kinda simple
all you do is just make a news report that would be fitting for fox news (e.g. "LIVE: the earth has started spinning! this is an emergency, we do not know what to do. will we all die today?")
i'll start
"WE HAVE FOUND A REAL PICTURE OF MULTIPLE PEOPLE BEING STABBED! right now, you are looking at a picture of a person going on a massive killing spree! this person has killed approximately 50 people. [insert picture of a person that's alive]"